Tag Archives: Gal Gadot

Death on the Nile Review

Truthfully, the adaptions of Agatha Christie’s work should be a gold mine for directors looking to get a foot on the ladder. They should not be a bright ensemble taking control of good prose but an example of how and why simple tropes still appeal to an audience. Kenneth Branagh’s starring role and work behind the camera as director of this latest Death on the Nile adaptation will continue on his trend of fascinatingly acceptable features. He can neither leap to greatness nor sink to degeneracy and in that mediocrity comes a seething resentment for a man doing just fine. A second turn for the man as Hercule Poirot beckons not how to solve this latest case, but why it needs presenting in this manner.

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Ralph Breaks the Internet Review

Finally, a film that captures the joys of consuming corporate products. Who’d have thought we would need such a feature? With Herculean strength, a young arcade gamer tears the metallic steering wheel from the welded shackles. This would be my living hell, and I am so glad Ralph Breaks the Internet gives me and you the chance to experience what would happen if the spaceship from Wall-E lived inside your router. Two bumbling idiots go on a quest to save the day, and with no variation between them, they soon blur together as a charmless clump, far removed from what they were in Wreck-It Ralph. A sad downgrade as these protagonists wanders the new world of upgrades and the internet.   

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Zack Snyder’s Justice League Review

Five years, four hours and $370 million later, this is what Zack Snyder has to show for himself. Justice League, or, to give it the full title should I be hung, drawn and quartered by the bedwetting fans of the DC Extended Universe, Zack Snyder’s Justice League, is the titan-like efforts of a collection of febrile, short-tempered aficionado’s demanding a second shot for their apparition of Christ. It is a testament to the strength of a mass, who can push their king toward another shot at glory. He boldly sits upon the directing throne, waving his hand to the side, and here, offers up his elongated piece. A final chapter to close off a very short book that nobody particularly enjoyed all that much. Here, in all its glory, is the redux edition. A creative has been given the budget of a respectably moderate Hollywood flick to reshoot a film that, compared to the other superhero filler released before and after it, can be considered a flop.

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Justice League Review

Collating the riff-raff that DC had thrown out to audiences under one umbrella term is no small feat, but to hurry them in a film together to counteract the decade-long head start Marvel received is the signs of a panicked cast and crew. Justice League, like many of these extended universe pieces, is a good idea on paper, and with the right pacing and length of time between them, could certainly have been something more. The blueprint is there but is expectedly foiled by the collaboration of idiots and fools who thought they had hit the peak of their creative powers, when, evidently, they were far from scratching the surface.  

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Wonder Woman Review

Inconceivable it may be, Wonder Woman is the best of a bad bunch. Still rotten to its core, the DC filmmaking inexperience surely insurmountable. Their staggering inability to provide something unique and at the same time keep up with the efforts of all the other cinematic universes now making the rounds is a collaboration of poor ideas and shoddy producers looking for what the teenagers of tomorrow will enjoy. Considering this, it is no surprise that the DC Extended Universe cavalcade finds its greys and browns and tonal nonexistence to be a sham and a farce. Wonder Woman presents that well, in an era of colours and shtick, candy-stuffed, headache-inducing guff, DC follows the thought process of grim and gritty storytelling as often as it can.  

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Ebirah, Horror of the Deep Review

Horrors linger above in the sky, the unmapped star system beyond this planet strikes fear into those that believe there is something out there waiting to attack. Why we as a Populus are more concerned with what is above than what is below is a striking damnation of our inability to see where real danger lies. We must explore our own planet and the depths it holds before we jet off to the stars looking for trouble. Jun Fukuda considers this with Ebirah, Horror of the Deep. Its title should give way to the obvious ruminations, the crab-like monsters that lurk deep on the ocean surface. What lies underwater is no match for the King of Kaiju, though, as expected, he tears through foes yet again in a competent rendition of monster madness. 

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Fast and Furious Review

After The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift offered up such an entertaining spectacle of drift king oriented action, I was expecting something equally as fun and refreshing with the follow-up and fourth entry into the series, Fast and Furious. Not to be confused with The Fast and the Furious, which is the first film but without all the articles stripped from its title. Instead, we receive a stripped-down version of the series, and the weakest so far in a film that feels both dated yet uniquely bland, an amalgamation of all things bad and dreary. It’d be forgivable if it were fun, but this boring, asinine entrant into the series is nothing to write home about.

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